Forgetfulness

Honestly I'm such a typical Gemini, 2 weeks since my last blog? Terrible. My memory is not one of my strongest points

We had lots of interesting moments recently. Last week we had our niece over for the night. She's nearly 4, amazingly she's very quiet but a humbug. For the most part she was good as gold. We took her, my son and the dogs down to our local park for a few hours. We love going as it can take an hour minimum to wander round, it also gives the dogs somewhere different to run. As we've not had Brian long we've not let him off the lead before as I ascertained very quickly after bringing him home he doesn't recall well. He got out several times, honestly he was like Houdini! I spent the morning after my first rugby training session in immense pain made worse having to belt down the road after a ginger streak that wouldn't come back. Thankfully he was caught by a gentleman who owned the dogs he went to play with. It took 3 weeks and 5 escapes for us to work out all the places he was getting out of. About 3 months ago we thought we'd cracked it until a spat of 3 escapes were the gate was being opened. In the end we screwed it closed and have not had another escape since (touch wood) Other than those teething problems he settled in so well. 

So knowing his knack for not returning, it took hubby 15 minutes of badgering and reassuring for me to agree to let him off the lead. Naturally he bolted, it took him a few seconds longer than I thought for him to realise he'd been 'released'. He took off like a made thing across the park, just as I thought I was going to take off after him, he turned and came back. He did this several times, we gave him loads of praise as this was going so much better than I'd hoped. The joy lasted about 20 minutes before he took off after a bird and vanished. It took a terrifying 5 minutes for him to come back. I won't be doing that again for a little while, after having a chat with friends we will be commencing whistle training asap and try again.

I got a lovely picture of him though before he belted

 These are also my 2 other favourite pictures from that day, firstly our niece very interested on what her cousin is up to and her trying to help me walk Brian

 Yep so that had naff all to do with forgetfulness but hey it's a recent post with some good pics

Arts & Past

Decorating this house has been a long oncoming task. We did the lounge, and 2 of the bedrooms when we first moved in. I wanted our son to have a room he liked as he's never had a properly decorated room before. The lounge was a horrendous pink colour, I couldn't face it so we decorated before moving everything in to place. That's as far was we got and we've been here just over 2 years. the kitchen is still lilac, the hallway is still orange and green (yes I know what a combination!) the toilet and bathroom are also lilac. its just awful. 

When I was younger I loved to paint and draw. It's something I haven't done for years due to various reasons. So decorating the house is the perfect excuse. 

I discovered Pinterest a few weeks ago, didn't think it was anything major until ideas about decorating started whizzing around my head. I originally wanted to do an undersea scape in the bathroom but I cant do the range of colours I want in paint that won't be ruined quickly. So I've migrated to the idea of doing a smaller on in the downstairs toilet. I need to make time to start as if I carry on the way I'm going it will never get done.

I remember doing lots of paintings on my walls growing up, my favourite was a cartoon gothic woman, long hair, pouting lips, long leather dress, with long red curtains and candles in the background. I remember being so proud to do that, 

I became very good at roses, shading the petals to give them texture. I always struggled with faces though, to make them look realistic, usually the lips were wrong, or I couldn't get the face into proportion.

I hope painting the house will bring back my love for it, hopefully some of my old talent will follow. The pictures I've pinned will hopefully give enough inspiration. I look forward to seeing the results and sharing them.

14 Things I Love

I had a hell of a day yesterday. Work wasn't easy and I spent a lot of time chasing around trying to fix other peoples mistakes and keeping customers calm.It's hard to remember the good things in life when I have days that I just want to run away and hide, to become a complete hermit and forget about the rest of the world. Although I would happily be a hermit.

I got tagged in one of those Facebook status' the other day, one where you list 14 facts about yourself. I tend not to do them but it seemed like a good idea. So I listed 14 things. After today I figured it'd be better to list 14 things I enjoy and love.

1) It goes without saying but my Son. He really is the light of my life. I didn't give birth to him but it doesn't matter. He is my Son. I love him with every waking moment. Don't get me wrong I'm not one of those parents who cannot see their their child has faults, he's human as we all are, he's not perfect. But he really is wonderful. I love his passion for life, he's so inquisitive, everything is to be explored, discovered, worked out. Yes he flits from one subject to another, it can be difficult to keep him focused for any length of time but when he really gets into something, he commits and can be furious in his thirst to learn. He loves his rugby, has been playing for 2 seasons now. He did that because he was bored of football but I didn't want him giving up sport. He started full contact this season, he has no fear at all, launching himself into a tackle whether to keep or retrieve the ball. He's started to grow his hair recently, it's almost shoulder length. suits him down to the ground. I think in 10 years time he's going to be the new Matt Hopper.
I love his features, when he smiles, properly, showing his teeth. His eyes sparkle when he's happy. They are such a pretty green colour with flecks of grey and brown. I could talk about him all day but I think I've made my point

2) Playing Rugby. I started this season, almost by accident. Hubby has been training the minis (under 6's and 7's) and little one had played a year by then so it was only common sense that when it came to making the float for the Lord Mayors Procession and appearing in it, we should all help and join in. At the end of a very tiring day, we're back at the club having a drink on a gorgeous summer evening when I'm asked when I'm joining the women's' team. I put it off for about a week before deciding I'd give it a go, almost a full season on I'm still here. I play prop, usually loosehead, but I can do tighthead. I've accumulated injuries, which my Son and I have been known to spend hours comparing, much to hubby's despair. He's not allowed to play under doctors orders. He loves watching us play, but naturally doesn't like seeing us hurt.

 3) Cooking. specifically baking, but I love to cook. Stews, preserves, cakes, cookies, bread, soups biscuits, pies, you name it I've probably cooked it at some point or other. Sadly I don't have the time to cook as much as I'd like to, having a house hubby and working 9 hours a day means he does most of it. But once in a while I will bake, C helps me, usually makes a mess gets bored half way through and wanders off, but he helps. The last escapade involved triple chocolate cookies and muffins. The one before was cheese bread, bean casserole, beef stew and chocolate biscuits. I'd love to start my own business of preserves, there seems to be a lacking in affordable home made foods.

 4) Music. As stated in my previous post, I live with music. If it wasn't for the unbearable protests, I'd happily sell the TV and just have the radio. Although I'd miss films. My favourite is Radio 2, much to most peoples amusement. I'm old before my time, I've missed my favourite era of music by about 15 years. By the time I was born it was nearly over, being a late 80's baby my favourite bands are either no longer together, dead or not what they used to be. Queen will always be my first love. But I like most things generally before 1992 or so.

 5) I love to dance. whether its just bopping casually round the kitchen or jiving/line dancing on a Monday in class. There's something about a beat I can't ignore.

6) Nature, both domestic and wild. My pets are my furbabies, extensions of the family. The dogs: Ben in his old grumpyness that now spends his days sleeping, Rusty with her gentleness towards children especially her best friend C. Brian the absolute nutter, who has this amazing doped look about him when he wakes up but is like a firecracker when he wants to play. Pepper, my only rabbit at the moment, inquisitive and boisterous, who will literally take the food from your hand when he wants his pellets. The guinea pigs, Malteser and Skittle who will squeak like nutters when you walk past but if you open their cage they run for cover. Even the fish have personalities. Only 2 have names, the plec, called Plecso, and Nemo the goldfish. So called because of his ability o look like he's moments from death before flitting off like nothings wrong.
I also love wildlife, I love to watch the birds, especially the young ones learning to fly in the spring. I had the pleasure of coming face to face with a vixen and her cubs once when I was a teenager. She'd come right to the edge of the garden, not surprising as we were surrounded but 35 acres of woodland. I was amazed, she was beautiful and to see her was completely mesmerizing.

 7) The weather and seasons. People complain if it's too cold, too hot, wet, not wet enough. I don't care, I love it all, something new happens every season, winter brings snow, as dangerous as it can make the roads, its beautiful, everything looks pure and calm. The stunning colour change in autumn, the reds and oranges as the trees change and get ready to shed so that new life can begin again in a few months. Spring, listening to the calls as life starts again, watching birds fly to and forth making nests. We had a thrush nest in a bush in the front garden at our old house, she was beautiful and it was wonderful to see her chicks grow so close. Finally summer, everything is in full swing, days on the beach, dancing in the rain because its warm enough to. The fresh smell after storms. 

8) My husband. Obviously. I listen to friends complain how lazy or uncaring their partners are. He's not like that. I come home to tea either ready or being cooked, the house is clean, the animals cared for or at least what little is for him to do as I do most of that myself as that's what I enjoy. He's loving and doting even when I don't deserve it. I'm very lucky

9) Walking. I can walk for miles,always with the dogs, there's some lovely places to walk directly near the house, I can be gone for 2 hours or more. A couple are good to let the dogs off through the woods, others are down the back roads so they have to be kept on their leads.

10) Reading. My favourite author is Stephen King. I love horror, I started reading Goosebumps when I was about 9, by the time I was 13 I'd read the Amityville Horror books and my first Stephen King book which was The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon. I also enjoy reading Sherrilyn Kenyon and Nora Roberts, including her pseudonym J D Robb. I have enough books to start a library, C is well on his way to joining me, at the moment he likes Roald Dahl who I enjoyed as a child and Andy Stanton.

11) I enjoy spending time in my garden, tending to my beds and shrubs. My favourite flowers are fuchsias and roses. I spend hours weeding, plating, dead heading and arranging. The back garden needs a lot of work, it was a complete mess when we moved in but we've cleared it down, now just waiting for the good weather to weedkiller what we want to gravel and reseed where we want the grass to grow.

12) Camping, getting back to nature as it were. Its a cheap and non fussy way of seeing places. why worry about spending a fortune on a hotel? just find a camp site with a shower and toilet, everything else can be done yourself. We went camping in Skegness last summer. We went exploring down the beaches, found a castle ruins and had a brilliant time.

13) I'm told I'm snap happy, I love to take photos and lots of them. My camera doesn't always suit my needs but I do the best with what I have until I can afford a better one.

14) An open fire. I grew up in a bungalow with no central heating, just an open fire in the lounge at one end of the building (it wasn't a standard bungalow, it was basically a long wooden shed) and a naff electric heater in our bedroom. On particularly cold days you could see your breath in the air in the mornings until the heater kicked in. When I wasn't outside, I spent the cold days of my childhood infront of the open fire, drawing, reading or just lounging. When I moved out I didn't have a place with an open for for 9 years until hubby and I moved here. We installed a wood burner into the fire place about a year after we moved in, the dogs love it, especially Ben, they've never had an open fire before. I've spent many evenings on the floor with one of the dogs infront of it. Usually Indie who is my Father in Laws dog when they lived with us. I find an open fire very calming no matter how stressful a day has been

Back to Normality

I've not been in the best of health recently. Before Christmas I went through a bought of insomnia. It doesn't come often but when I do I have about 2 weeks were I get maybe 2-3 hours of sleep a night, struggle through the days like a zombie until I am at the point of such exhaustion I flop and sleep straight for 18 hours the normality resumes. When this happens my entire life goes on hold, it's difficult being a parent at times like that let alone being capable of getting everything right with the pets, work and as for the little social life I have, forget that. Just as I felt better and felt capable of going back to rugby training and dancing, it left with me with 2 sessions of each before the Christmas/New Year break. Then a few days running up to Christmas I get this irritating cough, not the kind that goes with a cold but a hacking, way down from the bottom of your lungs, rib cracking cough. A week of coughing like I smoked again (and worse because my lungs felt I was on 80 a day but I was never anywhere near that bad) but getting to the point I couldn't breath, hubby drags me kicking to the doctors (I really didn't want to bother the doc over a cough!) to be told it's a chest infection. Never had one before in my life! I get given and inhaler and to go back in a week if I'm still having trouble. I did end up going back as even though it was getting better not by much. By this point I havent walked my dogs in 2 weeks! hubby has had to do it. I'm promptly met with a lecture of not resting (no rugby, no dancing and no dog walking, what more does she want). Thankfully apart from the odd cough now and then I'm all better, have successfully walked the dogs the last 3 nights and as of Sunday I will have my first match of the year, dancing Monday and training Tuesday.

For me this is normality.

It got me thinking though, what is normality? We're taught from a very young age the way things should be. You're born, go to school to learn, if your luck college and uni too, get a job, get married, buy a home, have kids, work till retirement then die. Isn't that horrid when it's broken down like that?

I did the growing up bit although I would say my childhood was far from normal. I didn't do college or uni, couldn't face being behind a desk anymore so I went straight to work. I moved in with my soon to be husband a year later. He was already a daddy, his little boy (my step son) was just 4 months old. Although we'd known each other nearly 3 years by then we'd only been dating about 5 weeks when I turned up on his doorstep asking to stay a few nights as I found myself homeless. The rest as they say is history. I was 20 when we married, C was 4 that year. We've been trying for a baby since just before we married, but nearly 6 years on we're getting used to the fact it may not happen. We've had the tests, just wanted to know why it was proving difficult. I have PCOS but apparently not sever enough to cause a huge problem, I should fall pregnant quite easily? Obviously not. But it's not the end of the world. People always seem baffled when we say, it's actually OK. Yes it would be nice, but we have C. I treat him like my own, Love him like I had given him life myself, he is my world and I really would do anything for that child.

Then there's the house buying... we did buy a house, in very unusual circumstances. Had to sell it again 4 years later due to those circumstances. Now renting a place, a council house. I'm sure that would make my mother so proud! (note the sarcasm) It's good though. It's a good size in a lovely village. The company is reasonable so my mini farm isn't a problem.

That's the other thing. How many pets is normal? A dog or 2? Maybe a couple of cats. Maybe a rabbit out the back that you've forgotten about and probably don't know how to car for anyway?

I grew up with 2 dogs, 6 cats, ferrets, 3 ponds of fish. Because we were smack bang in the middle of nowhere I learnt to care for hedgehogs that left it too late to hibernate, pheasants flocked to the garden to be fed at the shake of the tub of birdseed, even looked after one particular male who broke his wing. Lived for years. Raised a pair of ducks after our oldest dog put the mother off the nest and she didn't come back. Think Fly Away Home, but instead of using a plane to teach them to fly, we were running up and down the garden, flapping our arms. They got it in the end. Unfortunately one of them died before she got the hang of it but the remaining one brought her babies home every year for about 5 years.

I think there's a lot to be said for children who are privileged enough to grow up with animals.

Anyway back to the normality thing, what is it? If I tell people how young I was when I married and watch them work out my age when they know how old C is, is often quite funny. But I don't know if it's the age I am to have it all, but because it's just that. I have it all. I wasn't accidentally 'knocked up' at young age, I made the conscious decision to take on someone elses child and raise him as my own. We were together a reasonable amount of time before marrying. 

I can proudly say that apart from a few months in total due to loosing a couple of jobs (OK honestly I was fired from one but when you stand up to a chauvinistic pig that tends to happen). These days that's rare, especially at 25. 

I rambled a bit more than intended. I'll carry this thought on another day, I need my bed.

Defining Music Taste

I remember when I was young and started defining my own taste in music. Even remember the precise moment it happened. I was sat watching Stars in Their Eyes. There was a big man came on the show, cloth in hand and belted out this amazing song, 'Anything for Love'. The music captivated me, the voice was interesting, powerful. I was old enough to know that this show was about impersonating famous singers. Enquiring who this man, 20 minutes later I'm listening to Meat Loafs 'Bat Out of Hell' album.
From there my interest in music and that era exploded. Queen became my first love, I spent hours cruising through my parents CD's and LP's.
In the LP's and singles I found Guns 'n' Roses, Appetite for Destruction, in the singles I found Alice Cooper's Poison. In the CD's Cher and Def Leppard.
My love for 70's and 80's rock grew. Would often result in being hollered at to turn it down. Not for the sake of the neighbors though, we lived smack bang in the middle of nowhere, for the sake of my poor grandparents who lived at the far end of the garden.

My music taste is a lot broader now, admittedly not a lot of it is recent. I dislike just about anything this side of 1992. But I range from 60's up to the odd present song, classical to heavy metal, country to R&B. I love to dance and sing (albeit badly) laugh and cry. When in doubt music is my haven.

My son is 9 now and in the last year or so he's started doing the same. I'm watching him develop his own taste in music. Although I will always be a firm believer in being allowed to find his own tastes there is one exception... Justin Beiber is banned from the house on a permanent basis. I think his interest in music started when they used My Sherona in the Weetabix advert. I had the song on a compilation album that was promptly hijacked and played over and over again.

My husband bought me a bug radio for my birthday last year to keep in the kitchen, so I could bop around to my albums while baking, stewing, cooking and generally making a mess. I had it the grand total of 3 weeks when it was whistled away upstairs and my son is singing at the top of his lungs along with Freddie Mercury. It petered out for a bit, I retrieved my radio but not for long. I introduced him to David Bowie just after Christmas when I bought his best of album. I had it for 2 days before it, along with many others from my collection, vanished upstairs. Changes will be worn out before the summer. My Billy Joel CD is also one of his favourites at the moment, he jumps between the 2 at night. Yet like me, his taste varies. He started the way I did, with 70's and 80's, but while studying music at school he has asked Grandad to compose him a CD of Beethoven!

I'm proud to watch him create and learn his own taste in music, I'm also glad that it has stemmed from my tastes in music. That he enjoys what I do. I think this will prevent many arguments in the future. At least i won't be yelling at him to turn down some hideous music! I just hope that when he goes to high school he doesn't loose sight of the music he enjoys just to fit in...

introduction to me, rugby and life

I've tried a couple of times to start a blog, but I guess I'm a typical Gemini in that once I start something, I'm terrible at actually continuing or even finishing it. I have an unfinished bird table outside which i started 2 summers ago but I have decided I really will finish it this year.
I get bored very easily, very few things keep me grounded for any significant amount of time. My pets, my son, rugby and dancing are about the only things that do

Even my long suffering husband doesn't stand a chance!

And yes I put dancing and rugby in that same sentence. My customers have nicknamed me the dancing rugby player (creative huh?) I've been dancing for 5 years, but only started rugby this season. I was dragged kicking and screaming into that one, not the best potential when wanting to learn to play.

It was a hell of a shock to the system. My poor broken body that hasn't done any kind of sport since just before leaving school 10 years ago and been abused by my incessant smoking for 13 years certainly felt it. I only played touch for a couple of hours and was warned not to make my decision the following day nor the day after that, but give it at least 4 days before deciding if i definitely wanted to learn to play. I thought they were having me on, after all I'd only run up and down the pitch a few times, didn't get the ball much and when I did it took me a little while to work out that i either need to get rid of the ball or move with it, preferably in the direction of my posts. The next day I honestly thought I had been hit by a truck, but no where near as badly as I did after my first game. I played the grand total of 20 minutes before being carried off the pitch. In my defense I had been totally and utterly flattened, or so I thought. I had gone in for a ruck (protect the ball if its on the floor for non rugby folk) next thing i know I'm falling backwards end land flat on my back with an immense amount of pain flying through my chest. most of my ribs cracked as did several parts of my spine. I was under the impression that the woman who i vaguely remember getting off my had flattened me with her entire weight. I'm laying there like a complete wally, panicing because i cant breath, seeing stars and aware that I can hear coach, medic an ref above me somewhere amongst the pretty glitter dancing round my head.

I found out several days later that the horrible cracking sound, which thankfully resulted in nothing being broken, had been caused by none other than my opponents knee landing dead center to my chest. I had been talked out of going back on for fear if i took another hit like that I really would have broken something. I spent the rest of the game stretching my chest and pacing.
I have since learnt, if in doubt, protect your head and chest. Rugby, although not complicated, its not the easiest thing to grasp especially as up until 6 months ago the most I knew about it was run forward and throw the ball backwards. To be honest that's probably still about all I know about rugby just don't tell my team mates!

I got into it because my little one plays. He's a little bruiser and will go far in this fine game with the right training, which i have every faith our club can offer him.

Outside of rugby, work and general home life are my pets. 3 dogs, our 16.5 year odl springer spaniel, 10 year old heinz 57 and our latest addition Brian, 2 year old working cocker spaniel. This is the name he came with and I just didn't have the heart to change it. The idiot suits his name and he is most definitely ot the Messiah he is a VERY naughty boy. But we love him and he's slowly adjusting to life with a family.

In addition to that we have the fish, unfortunately in a tank as I do not have the space for a pond, the 2 guinea pigs, Malteser and Skittle, so named by our son, and my beautiful Pepper, a huge black and white rabbit with the most beautiful long lop ears you've ever seen.

I currently work for a courier firm, it's boring but pays the bills. I get to speak to some interesting characters but that's a tale for another blog.

I've rambled enough, hopefully I'll remember to be back soon!